He still does not write his name ?!

 Child development is a serious matter, important to all of us.

As parents, we watch our developing child from the side especially at a young age, and wonder, is what he is doing good? Does it match the expected age?

The confusion becomes greater when comparing to "his peers" the children with him in kindergarten because there you see a wide range of abilities and sometimes it can be stressful. "Danny is already drawing squares and my son is just circles and lines." First of all, it is important to remember that one kindergarten has children in the age range that is spread over a year and sometimes two years, and it is possible that Danny is older than your child by a good few months. In development, each month is significant.

Another thing that will help is to know some significant milestones in the development and it helps to know what to expect and no less importantly what not to expect.

A few days ago, a worried mother approached me and said that in her daughter's kindergarten, the 3.3-year-old asked the parents to practice writing a name with the children because "at this age, you start writing the name of at least trying." The mother who called said that her daughter did not cooperate with her, did not want to write and when she tried, it was really difficult for her.

So first thing I reassured the dear mother was that at the age of 3 children still do not have to write their name and also do not need to try. Writing a name is a fairly advanced graphomotor skill. It will be made possible after some other skills have been developed and established and allow the child to perform it.

Development is a process that takes place in stages in sequence and there are no shortcuts.

There are steps in the way that can not be skipped and there are steps that can be skipped, but it will have some price later on. So let's talk about stages in graphomotor development.

 For more information and details read articles

But before that, what is graphomotor skills?

Grapho motor skills refer to skills that involve the use of writing tools (drawing, coloring, writing).

 

 The expectation is that a child will draw one single distinct line around age 2.10 (two years and ten months). Before that, from the age of 1.4 or so, a child would experience grasping color, using it on the page, and creating scribbles that are becoming more and more controlled.

 

If we assume that the mother of the girl who does not want to write her name at the age of 3.3 is called Ayala, then Ayala is definitely right in her reluctance - trying to write her name is very frustrating for her. Developmentally she still does not know how to connect two lines together and not draw a diagonal line.

Asking her to write her name at this point, will make her feel insecure, incompetent.

 

It is important to know that before writing his name, the child learns to recognize his written name. Already in the children's home, the child sees his name on his water bottle, on his personal drawer, on the worksheets he prepares, and more, and gradually he begins to recognize this pattern of letters of his name.

Developmentally it is expected that a child will recognize his written name around the age of 4. There will be children who will recognize their names even earlier.

In terms of writing the name, it is expected that a child will write his name around the age of 5. There will be children who will write their name even earlier but this is not required.

 

For what reasons should you not start practicing writing a name too soon? (E.g. at age 3)

Feeling of frustration and failure - A child who starts practicing too soon is more likely to have great difficulty and be frustrated by his failure. He will feel that he has failed when in fact he has not failed but is simply expected to do something that is not suitable for him. Our ambition in raising children is to challenge them to the right degree so that it will be interesting to them but not impossible for them - so that they will develop into children who are confident in themselves and in their ability.

 

2. There are so many things that can and should be practiced with the child before writing his name, that are appropriate for his age, will be more interesting and satisfying to him, and will also prepare him for the later challenge of writing his name.

 

So what are the things to do with kids ages 3 and up?

Let them stick stickers freely or in circles or on lines you have created - this is a key to controlling hand movement and what is called precision ability.

Let them play with plasticine and dough, it strengthens the hands and develops mobility in the palm and fingers.

Let them experiment with painting with a variety of colors (thick and thin markers, wax paints, panda paints, hand paints, stamps, gouache paints, shaving foam, and more). Each color allows for a different painting experience, requires the application of a different force on the color (pressure regulation), and produces a different product and the child learns a lot from it.

Let the children go through broad paths that you can create for them.

 Let the children cut with free scissors and on straight lines as you watch over them.

 

And the child will learn a lot from all of these - and whatever he learns, will help him learn to write his name down the road.

There is no need to accelerate development, it is better for the child to experience and strengthen his age-appropriate skills because these will prepare him well for the next stage.

Of course, if a parent feels worried or unsure about their child's development in any area, it is advisable to consult a developmental doctor for an examination. He will already know if it is necessary to refer you to a professional who specializes in the field or to reassure you that everything is fine and the child is developing excellently.